When they folded, it was returned to me to do as I wish.
And then I suddenly found myself afraid to publish it so it's been in a folder for a few months.
“If I wear this long jacket and stand just so, no one will even realize how overweight I am.” “If the lighting at the restaurant is dim enough, I can totally get away with this top.” “If I wear these heels, my legs will look slimmer. ” “If I make self-deprecating jokes about the size of my ass and make him laugh, he’ll fall in love with my sense of humor.” “If I show up later in the evening, all the beautiful people will have gone home.” “If I show up earlier in the evening, all the beautiful people won’t be there yet.” “If he isn’t interested, it’s fine — who meets their soulmate in a bar anyway? In a very pragmatic way, it is also actually physically hard to meet someone in Los Angeles.
Our bars and restaurants are crowded, and I hate being the big girl trying to squeeze into a booth or through the room. Asking a restaurant hostess to move my party to another table because I literally could not fit into it.
It’s downright tough to leverage myself into a cluster of people waiting for drinks at a bar. Sometimes the skinny girl’s easy, fun night out in Hollywood is the fat girl’s night of stressful geographic strategy.
One I’ll never forget: “Your shape is not desirable to me.” At least he tried to make it sound like a business transaction.No law says I have to lower my standards, even though sometimes a guy will make me feel like I do. I’ll never forget the time a friend implied that I should “keep to my own.” Since I am heavy, I guess I need to date a heavy guy. I'm not allowed to be attracted to Chris Evans because he's fit.A skinny guy would never be attracted to a fat girl. To be clear, I’ve dated guys of all shapes and sizes.But my big hips preclude me from being relationship material? Some men assume that if you’re overweight, you are also desperate and use that as an excuse to treat you like dirt.I'm great for a roll in the hay but not to meet mom. Some prey on the vulnerability of heavy girls, hoping to get laid quickly and get out without any further commitments.I don't know why, but I finally felt like sharing it.