But when 30 hit, let’s just say God and me were in a fight.
You go to youth group, you love Jesus, you meet someone, you graduate high school, you get married, and as the fairy tales say, “You live happily ever after.” When I was 19 I was ready. At 27, I understood and accepted that God was using the last few years to prepare me for marriage.
Growing up in the church, I thought I had a solid understanding of how my story would play out.
No matter how you choose to word it, being single was never in my plans.
If your identity is in Christ alone, then your life will automatically come into conflict with your non-believing girlfriend or boyfriend. Proverbs says, Those we build our lives around, the people who are closest to us, are the ones who can either help bring us close to God, or pull us farther away.
It's what Paul was referring to in 2 Corinthians when he said, I know that this seems so easy to say.
It felt like everyone I knew was married, including the kids I used to babysit.
So when the opportunity arose, I figured I would just take things into my own hands. As a believer, especially if you grow up in the church, you can convince yourself that non-Christians aren’t nice people.
The moment I made the decision to waver on something I always said I would never compromise on, the offers flooded in. He had a great career and he truly could give me everything I ever wanted in this life. I knew he wasn’t a believer, but I wanted to spend time with him and get to know more about him. But the reality is, more often than not, they are great.
This tells us two things: one, that relationships are hard; and two, that God knows it.
While there may be a lot of reasons or contributing factors as to why a Christian would make the choice to be in a romantic relationship with a non-Christian, I don’t believe that it is simply a relational issue.
Dear Christians who make a point of letting their Christian friends who are in serious relationships with non-Christians know that they think it’s wrong for a Christian to date or marry a non-Christian: If I ever meet you, I am going to beat you up. And basing your criticism on some nonexistent rule that toxic gossip, which, in the descending rings of hell, puts you just above waiters who spit in people’s food, and just below people who don’t clean up after the dog they’re walking.)And if it’s your opinion that God automatically condemns the Christian who marries a non-Christian, then you’ve clearly tossed out, along with the baptismal water, Paul, who wrote in 1 Corinthians: For the unbelieving husband has been sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife has been sanctified through her believing husband. How do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband?